I have moved to India from Singapore last month. My family is not sure if we would stay in Bangalore or return to Singapore. I had a wonderful family life in Singapore with my daughter and husband. After a lot of separation and emotional upheaval, Baba settled us in Singapore from May 2013 to May 2014. I can only say that i am thankful and grateful to Him for taking care of my married life. After 8 years of married life, I could feel Baba’s blessings on our family with peace and contentment between me and my husband. We have a lovely 4 yr old daughter who is also a close devotee of Baba. I want to share my experience about how Baba decided what’s good for us and made us visit Shirdi too. In mid April this year, my husband’s project work was supposedly getting over in Singapore. But he sought to move into another project as we wanted to continue living in Singapore. He had no projects in Singapore and we had to leave to India on May 3rd, 2014. It was very upsetting for us as we were not mentally prepared to return to India. Only for the sake of having a peaceful family time in Singapore, we wanted to stay there and return to India after 2 yrs or so. By Baba’s grace my family life was going smoothly and I did not want to disturb that peace and contentment.
My husband was getting offers from Dubai and his boss wanted to move too. But I was reluctant as I did not want to go to any other country, as it would be hard for my daughter to change her schooling once again. I asked Baba to do the best. I used to pray to Baba to please do not send me away from Singapore. I have developed an emotional relationship with the Sai Temple there and every Thursday i used to cook items and distribute in Temple. I did not want to leave Singapore, but my husband was getting an offer in Dubai for a lot of money. Now we had to choose between Singapore and Dubai? I did not know what to do. Should I give preference to Dubai offer and leave Singapore? I was wondering how can Baba let me go, and I went to Shiva temple and prayed to all deities to not to send me anywhere. But things started changing in my husband’s office. He had asked his bosses for another project and there was no other project there. He felt he was losing value as he was repeatedly asking his bosses. The colleague who gave the Dubai offer was telling him that I will talk to your wife and convince her. He came to visit us and briefed us about Dubai. But one incident happened just before he came to meet us.
My husband picks my daughter usually from school every day. I was getting restless about not able to decide between Dubai or Singapore. His salary in Dubai was over 8 Lakhs a month, and he was getting the Indian pay in Singapore with per deem amount and accommodation expenses from expenses. By Baba’s grace there was no dearth of food and clothing in our lives. We were contented, but were unsure of settling in one place. Also, I did not want to give importance to money over Baba, but I could not see my husband’s plight too. I went to the same Shiva Temple again a day before and prayed to all the deities too do the best and decide if Dubai was good for us or not. I felt very strange too, and was mocking myself as I pleaded Baba not to send me anywhere from Singapore just 2-3 days before, but again now I am myself asking Baba and all deities to do if He can send us to Dubai. I felt that the essence of a Guru like Baba is needed the most in Kalyug where there are a lot of temptations, and what seemingly could be an excellent opportunity could also turn to be something disastrous later. Only a Guru can predict and guide and can save us from such misery. One should surrender all wishes at his feet and seek his advice for a peaceful life.
I hence wanted to go and ask Baba by using chits as what He wants us to decide as we have to decide something very quickly. I wanted to go to temple and checked the Q&A site before leaving. The reply was” Do today’s work tomorrow”. Exactly that moment, my husband called up and asked me if it’s possible for me to pick my daughter. I told him Baba told to do today’s work tomorrow. Next day I wanted to ask Baba and confirm our decision. I did not want to do anything against Him. He has warned me several times not to give importance to money. Daily I pick one episode from Sai Baba episodes, and I got a warning that money is not everything, money is poison, money can change relationships. For me, the emotional bond I share with Baba is valued the most, and I did not want anything to change that. My husband also told me let’s ask Baba. I was to leave to temple and prepared my chits. Every time I asked a question in Q&A site I got the answer “come to Shirdi”. It happened 3 times, and I was in turn asking how??? It feels so funny now when I remember how I was getting tensed and restless, but Baba was just replying one answer-come to Shirdi. I was like “Baba, we are in the middle of a complicated situation to choose between Dubai and Singapore, and how will I come to Shirdi Baba?”
Finally I got a message on my mobile from a Sai shop in Singapore to visit the store. He had sent some Sai Pictures too. I asked Baba many time not to send me anywhere from Singapore, but later I asked Him please do something. I also felt that I should not curb his career growth, where he is getting paid more. I did not know if this offer from Dubai was a test from Baba or Baba’s blessing? We need His acceptance for taking the 8 Lakhs Dubai offer. We did not want to return to India as we had a terrible time with a lot of family issues. We decided to stay away at least for 2-3 years for the sake of our family life and we did not want our daughter to grow up in such an environment. I was about to leave to Temple, when my husband called and told that his colleague will be coming home to talk to us about Dubai. That moment I remembered why Baba said ” Do today’s work tomorrow”. I asked Him again in Q&A site about our problem and again it was answer similar to visit Shirdi. I told Baba You decide this first, we will visit Shirdi. I immediately rushed to temple and prayed for some time. I randomly read few chapters for some strength of mind. I was also nervous because if Baba declined Dubai offer and we have no project in Singapore, we would have no option but to return to India. I feared a lot about losing out on peace and contentment the most. I did not know what was Baba testing, me or my husband or the trust in Him. I had told my husband that if Baba says yes to Dubai we will consider it. He had no reason to tell his colleague why he was reluctant to move to Dubai. He just plainly told my wife is not comfortable to leave Singapore, but the reality is I did not want to leave my favourite Sai temple. He knew that everything depended on Baba and I had asked him to do a week Parayan for some mental relief. He was doing it sincerely too.
Now, at the temple I took the courage to ask Baba, what to do? Seeing my husband asking his bosses repeatedly for other project hurt me too, as he was being less valued. I asked Baba to decide and placed the chits in front of Him. Somehow with courage I picked it up and it was Dubai. It was a big moment for me, and I knew that Baba was testing us if we would give Him importance or not in deciding a job offer. I felt very relieved as my husband would now be relieved from his colleague’s pressure. Actually my husband did not convey to me what he was going through all day in office. He was getting restless from afternoon, as the project he expected his company will get in Singapore was in Bangkok! He had no choice now, and did not know how to manage things in India too, as we wanted wholeheartedly to stay in Singapore for at least another year. But when I told him that Baba accepted to Dubai offer, it was such a relief for us emotionally, as we did not want to progress without His blessings. It’s only His miracle, that on the same day, He called me to come to Shirdi through His Q&A site 5 times! Any question I ask Him, He would reply “visit Shirdi” and I would be like how Baba???? But everything turned to be smooth later.
We left Singapore with a heavy heart on May 11th but also with a lot of hope to return to that country sometime later. Before leaving Singapore, I bought a small yellow Sai Idol and placed it inside the shrine of Chinese gods. I told Him next time I will come to Singapore I will take You back again. I did it because I felt someone would need Sai like how I needed someone desperately too. We are now in India. We don’t know how long Baba will keep us here. His wonders and miracles are exemplary. We are living in Bangalore with my sister and brother-in-law for over a month, and I have a small Durga Maa Temple with Sai Baba Idol too. I have been visiting the temple and had fed 3 black dogs bread and rotis whenever possible. Last two Thursdays I fed 2 black dogs and felt very happy too. Such small incidents gave me the feeling that Baba is all around and is still consuming what I cook, just like the way we used to do in Singapore. At times I miss the Thursday Darshan in Singapore, my first 9 Thursday Vrat was over there, my first intimate bonding with Baba was also in that country. But some where I feel that Baba wants us to be with my sister too, as she is going through a stressful period too. I hope Baba will ease her anxiety and do the best. As of now, I feel that He wants us to stay here to give her some emotional and moral support in a family.
After we came to India we went for a Shirdi trip on May 24th. I was lucky that I visited Shirdi on a Thursday, had a close Darshan from Baba and also saw the Palki procession. I will post the Shirdi experience in another post later. We had a wonderful Darshan and immediately after the Shirdi trip my husband fell sick as he had kidney stones problem. He was to leave for Korea, but he was feeling very weak on that day and I told him to cancel the travel. We had to rush him to emergency later at 12 am, because of his severe pain. I was roaming from hospital to home next 2 days, but was relieved as I saw Baba’s Picture outside the hospital window and also saw His picture in the insurance department. I felt assured that He will take care of my husband. After my husband’s discharge, he found out that there are no projects available in Singapore yet. But he got an offer from his clients company to work there. The only chance for us to get back to Singapore is through his client, hoping the same if salary is negotiated. I would love to get back to Singapore as Baba became close to me in that country. For how long we will be in Bangalore, I don’t know, but there is so much of peace when everything is left to Him.
These days I don’t pray for anything in particular, I just pray do what’s good for us. My husband may get job likely in Bangalore too. We are ready to accept anything as we feel that Baba wants us to be in Bangalore now. Even our family life is very smooth in India, which I feared the most. My daughter is enrolled in L.K.G here by Baba’s grace. We checked so many schools and almost finalised one school. I internally prayed please guide us Baba in the last minute, and within 10 minutes we found a Bachpan play school and decided on that. We are very happy with the school too. There is a car with Baba’s Picture on it near the school. Every evening when I pick her up I feel Baba was guarding her. We have located a huge Sai Mandir near our sister’s place and it is wonderful because we feel we have Baba near our reach. Whatever Baba decided let it happen is the confidence and trust we have on Him. My husband still has not got any offers confirmed and is also planning to switch company, but Baba will decide what is best for him and for all of us too. His miracles change the nature of a person really. I was very restless, tensed, fearful, and unhappy and had very low self confidence, but now by His grace I feel peaceful, very confident and relaxed too. Please trust Baba wholeheartedly and pray leaving all anxieties to Him, He will do the rest as well as the best. I do not know where we will live after few months, either in Bangalore, Singapore or Dubai (also on hold for next 2 months), but there is so much of peace of mind only with the thought that Baba will analyse, decide and give the best to our family. Please remember that whatever decision Baba takes will involve all the family members involved and not individually. I sincerely feel that Baba is delaying our plans so that we should not face any adverse situation in a foreign land. Because my husband got admitted for kidney stones only after we came to Bangalore, luckily my brother-in-law was available to take care of him. Please trust Him and be patient. Om Sai Ram