Dear Didi, Thanks for your wonderful website that helped me to strengthen my faith on Sai Baba. Here I am sending you my experience. If you think that it will help others to improve their faith, and then do post it. I will be glad to help others. Please don’t disclose my name and mail id. You can edit it if you feel so.
It has been only 3 months that I have become a devotee of Baba. The story how I came closer to Baba is as follows. Last year I passed my B. TECH. from a college in ORISSA. During my B. TECH., I used to stay in hostel. Two of my roommates were devotee of Saibaba. They used to tell me their experiences. Though I was not a devotee, but I have never disrespected their faith. I had some issues in my relationship because of cast problem. One of my roommates started doing Nav Guruvar Vrat. She told me the benefit of doing it and proposed me to start it. But I didn’t listen at that time. I still remember that I had told her that when time comes, I will do it. Then I forgot that line.
Because my whole family is a Devi Pujak, so it was quite tough for me to accept some other God. On 1st December 2012, I had visited my sister’s place. Her brother in law gave me one Saibaba’s idol and 2 UDI packets. At that time I didn’t know what I am going to do with the idol as we already had one in our prayer room. So I told him to keep the idol with him and requested him to give me the UDI packet. I realized that he felt bad of that. And after my sister told me, I brought the idol and kept it in the packet as I had brought it. At that time I didn’t know what was going on around me. Soon after I came back home, the real storm came into play in my life, when I had break up because of same reason.
I felt as if I lost everything. Even I felt as if I lost my God too. I used to believe that he came to my life just because it was my GOD’s wish. I never intended to say yes to him, because of the same cast problem. And I said to my God if you think that being committed to him is good for me, then make him come to me or else give me the strength to say no and continue living as I used to do. I didn’t sleep the whole night the day before I said yes to him. You won’t believe how situations were manipulated and I was forced to say yes to him. As if God was forcing me to say yes.
Whenever I visit any temple I used to pray to make everything normal in my relationship. Most of the time a flower will fall. So I used to believe that my God is there to take care of my relationship. The day I had breakup, I cried a lot in front of that person, but he didn’t listen to me. Because he said that his parents won’t agree in any condition. I felt that as if my God cheated on me. My friends used to tell me that perhaps I decoded the message (falling of flower, inner believe etc) in a wrong way. But I could not make myself understand. I used to cry whole day in front of God. Even many times I requested to kill me than to give me this pain. It was really intolerable for an emotional person like me.
After some days, I went to my same friend’s (Saibaba’s devotee) place. I went to Saibaba’s temple with her with devotion in my heart for the 1st time. Because at that time I was ready to bang my head on any stone if someone would have said that God is there. I really pray to Sai Baba not to give such pain to anyone. We were sitting in the steps of the temple. I was still crying. Seeing me crying my friend reminded of my word. But she said that “I will advice you to do Nav Guruvar Vrat. Only if he tries to contact with you after this (At that time I didn’t have contact with him). Soon after, I came out of the temple. I felt like checking my mobile. After some time, I checked my mobile and there was a message from him. My joy knew no bounds then. I thanked Baba many times for listening to my 1st prayer to him. Then my friend told me that Baba wishes me to start Vrat. She told me the process to do it. 20 days after that, I had my posting in Chennai. So I decided to start it after coming to Chennai.
At that time, at home I was praying to keep me in a place nearby his temple. My prayer was also answered. I came to Chennai, searched in google for a temple nearby. As I was new to the place, the address was not clear. Then I went out for searching the day before I started Vrat. But I could not get it because as I don’t understand Tamil, so it was tough for me the follow instructions given by the people I asked. I came out of a shop dis-heartedly and decided that from next Thursday onwards I will visit temple. Perhaps a lady was observing me asking people about Baba’s temple. She suddenly came and gave me 20 rupees to give it in the temple. I told her that I don’t know when I am going there. Still she gave me and went. I felt like as if it was none other than Baba, who is pulling me to come to His temple.
On Thursday I went and asked everyone and finally reached the temple. It was my 1st experience of evening Aarti and I enjoyed a lot. And I did my Vrat with the same idol given to me by my sister’s brother in law. Baba remembered my word and made me keep it. I have already completed my 8th Thursday. It was really a miracle for me to arrange everything that I need to start my Vrat. I prayed Baba to help me. And He really did help me. Some days back, I read it in a website that Baba says “No one can come to Me by his/her own wish. It’s Me, who pull them to come to Me”. Now I realize this statement very well. And also I have experienced the miracle of UDI even. That is really great gift by Baba.
I don’t know what is going to happen in future, whether my relationship will be restored or not. But I know one thing that I got a new relationship with Baba. In which no one will lose interest and there is no cast problem. Now I have good understanding with Baba. Sometimes I get angry on Him, when He doesn’t listen to my prayer. Sometimes when I am unable to tolerate the pain, I say Him that I won’t talk to Him anymore, which I can never do. I used to pray God to bless me with a relationship that won’t make me lonely. Now it seems I got it. I pray God that my faith may increase in many folds as I grow. I know He is going to be there with me always. I really wish to live a happy life and help others to be happy as I used to do. I don’t want to cry anymore. Whoever is reading this, please pray for me. And I am praying Baba to keep you all in peace and bestow His blessings on you as well.
Sri Ananta Koti Brahmand Nayak Rajadhi Raj Yogi Raj Parabrahma Sachchidananda Sainath Maharaj Ki Jai.