Feeling Lonely And Like Being Rejected By Baba – Anonymous Sai Devotee

In below post this devotee has shared sad parts of her life and needs advice from all of us.


Anonymous Devotee from India says: Hi Hetal Ji, Please don’t disclose my mail id. I am a female. I have suffered enough in my life. Please do suggest me something either post this or you reply to me personally.

I know Sai Baba since school days, but I have not been His devotee. I used to worship Lord Ganesh, but He ditched me. He spoiled my education, my character, broke my love twice, shattered our family and my dreams almost everything. I lost hope in God as well as in people and life. I was leading a very hopeless and lifeless life. Suddenly I started liking one of my colleagues and even fell in love with him. I didn’t know whether he was poor or rich and anything about nor was I interested in knowing all that. But I liked and loved him truly. Because he was a very jovial person and active made me smile. I used to chat with him and call him. He replies only when I call. This went on for about a year. Suddenly he started to respond less. I felt very restless and afraid whether I’ll lose him. So at that time, I came to know of Saibaba again and started praying Him.

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First God proved His existence by doing miracles. Then during that time on one Thursday, I went to His temple before going to office and that day was my appraisal as well. But that year’s appraisal was worse. I got a very less rating and all my peers who joined with me got promoted except me. In that few were not even worth to be kept in job, but even they got promoted. This was the first huge sadness, which Saibaba gave me. At that time, I was very upset. So my boss started to console me. Then he started showing some care on me occasionally. In the meantime the guy whom I loved also started to maintain distance. I don’t know whether he knows that i love him or not, but he started to maintain distance. He didn’t respond properly for my calls and messages. I became even more upset. At that time, my boss became very close to me. He started messaging and calling me and as I was left alone and upset and dejected with many things. I started getting close with him even. I know he is a married guy and have a kid. Still due to his care, love and importance which he gave I fell in love with him. But even that didn’t last for me. One of my dream was to go onsite that too based on my talents and work related. With Sairam's grace, that happened. I got that chance. Since the day my boss said about my trip, we started fighting personally for some other reason. It was again because of a woman, but not his wife. Since that day we fight then get convinced. Then suddenly two days before my travel, I got a message from him saying that his wife knew everything about us. Since that day he started avoiding my dream got smashed and I didn’t enjoy that ten days trip even. The only good thing which happened in my life since childhood was the trip, but I was not in a position to enjoy my trip even. Baba was the one who gave him to me. This incident happened 2 years back. I am crying since that day this date. I am unable to come out from this pain. I might I fallen in love thrice but except for the first one the other two didn’t make me feel or cry that much. Even the first though it was hurting and made me stand shameful in front my family. I came out from that pain in six months. I was very innocent and pure at that time. I was very sincere and I used to do anything for that guy though I was poor. I used to spend money. Though that person was not good and used to hurt me, I was true. He didn’t realise me or understand my love till the last minute. Though I did many things for him I didn’t think him to be my husband, but my last love though it’s a wrong love. I was again sincere to this married man and I was living with him daily in my dreams and imagination. I thought him to be my husband. I am suffering very badly since last two years. Now top up my pain, God has taken my job as well. I am 31 still not married also. I have lost many things since my childhood. I lost my studies, my character, my love four times, my promotion 3 times, in 6 years of my job. I have not gotten a good rating even once. But I am a very good and dedicated worker. Everyone knows that they appreciate, but don’t reward me. I am searching job since once year, but I am not getting. I am without a job since 4 months suffering without. Since I don’t have money, I am unable to visit temples even. I don’t have peace at all in life. I don’t have a good father also. We don’t even speak. Mom is crying to herself, since I am not getting married. I don’t have friends and not close with relatives also. I have one brother he is good, but don’t like to take me out. He likes spending time only with friends. Mom is very sweet still she does not know my pains or reason for my tears. She won’t even ask why I am upset or crying. She doesn’t know how to console me even. When I am upset, she only should give positive thoughts and make me feel better. But even she will join me and start getting upset saying why nothing good is happening to you. I am feeling very depressed and broken at heart. I don’t want to live. Please pray for me and ask Baba to take me off from this world. Ask Him to punish me in hell, but not in this world. I am feeling very restless each minute. I am feeling very lonely and feel rejected and useless. I want to ask you one more thing Hetal Ji. Since I became an ardent devotee of Baba, I am crying on all Thursdays. God is making me cry on all Thursdays for some reason or the other. I haven’t been without crying on Thursdays. Why is that? It’s our day. Baba's day then why is He doing this. Does Baba also hate me? Where will I go and how should I kill myself? Please tell me. Don’t be without replying please. Baba I am waiting for your reply through Sai Sister Hetal. Don’t disappoint me in this as well.


© Devotees Experiences with Shirdi Sai Baba

Hetal Patil
Hetal Patil
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70 Comments

  1. Do Sai Satcharitra parayan and nine thursday vrat. Besides materialistic gain, you will get immense amount of peace, consistence and happiness…Sai bless you

  2. Its natural for us as human beings to desire things. But we have to make sure that its logical, good & within our reach. It looks like you are going after all the wrong things. Its ok, dont worry….
    As the above person said, do Sri Sai Satcharitra parayan for 9 Weeks. Read 1 chapter everyday in 9 weeks. if you finish soon, start again…. during this period, try to keep calm & dont ask anything from Baba. He knows what is best for you, just leave everything to him, he will take care of it….
    May Baba bless you with good life & all happiness. Om Sai Ram.

  3. Hello sister, Please don't ever think to end ur life as this is the only chance you have to worship our beloved baba.. he will surely help you out of your bad days he will always guide you in every aspect and every work you if you have strong shradha and saburi as these two are baba's most lovable characters he want from us!! please don't loose hope on our sai maa.. though he tests our patience later he will come running towards us.. don't think on materialistic things think about baba and do his naam smaram daily from the minute you get up from ur bed to till go to bed again!! keep smiling always.. 🙂

  4. dear sister, pls do Sai Satcharitra parayan. and 9 thursday vrat. and used to do daily 1 chapter parayan from Sai Satcharitra. soon you will get peace. don't except anything from baba. what you are facing from few years is past karma may be. now you dont know what you need exactly. pls dont repeat those mistakes which you have done earlier. so pls keep faith and patience. pray baba with complete devotion.leave everything in sai lotus feet. rest he will take care. baba knows when, where and what to give. those who have complete faith in him, he never disappoint them. pls beleive this. baba pls bless her with peace and happy life. pls bless all living beings in earth.

    jai sai ram!

    • Hi i have read sai charitra and yes it touched my soul and being….sai baba was always against vrat….i mean yes u may fast for your body…but sai never asked any of his devotees to fast….

  5. Om Sai Ram

    Dear sister, keep faith on our lord baba do not be upset have shradha and saburi.Pl do 9 Thrusaday baba vrat your wish be fulfilled.
    Good luck

    Sree

  6. Sister,

    I feel very sorry and sad hearing your story. But what u r not understanding is that all those ppl u loved are not correct persons. They only used u but they did not love u back the way you loved them. Especially that married person, he was just playing with u. He has a wife at home and still he is going after other women. Dont u understand his character from that? I might be wrong but I feel what Baba wants to teach is to stop loving and getting cheated and hurt by such kind of persons. Please leave all this love for some time. Love only your parents because they are the only persons who will support u no matter what. Please dont blame your mother and father. They might be going through more pain seeing their daughter in this situation. Try to think from their point of view also. Only concentrate on career and dont get attracted to these kind of wrong persons. Leave everything to our Baba and one day he will show you a life partner whom u r worth of.

    May Baba bless everyone. Baba pls dont let us go in wrong path. After all we all are your children.

  7. Sai ram, don't think of killing yourself, when you read saiSatcharitha you will come across this. If your past karma is not over you will born again with difficulties. Think sai all the time, you will get peace of mind.

  8. Pray Baba deeply. Do Sai Satcharitra Parayan (to be completed in 7 days) or Nine thursday Saibaba Vrat. Very effective. It will give you peace and happiness.

  9. Hello,
    Do Sai Satcharitra prayan , complete parayan in a week time, start from this thursday and complete it on wednesday, n then on wednesday donate food to poors as per your capacity. And do this with full devotion and faith Baba will definetly help you out. Om Sai Ram.

  10. Whatever we suffer is due to our bad karma. Dying doesn't solve anything. Take one step at a time, prioritize your needs. Falling in love with a married man is not the right thing to do, it breaks a family apart and you would be one of the reasons for it. Learn to classify what is good and bad. Read Sai Satcharita regularly. Baba will set you in the right path only if you give him your true devotion and believe in him with full faith. Blaming God for the mishaps in your life will only depress you more. There are people in the world who have much worse problems, just look at them and pick up yourself and move on. Dont look at your past, it'll only hold you back. Move forward and plan your future wisely and work towards it and leave the rest to Baba. If you believe in him truly, he will take care of the rest.

  11. There are so many orphans in this world. They don't even have own people to atleast care. They are living happily with all the hopes. I have seen people getting married at the age of 35 and leading a happy life. So please stay strong. your problems will be gone soon and you get a good job and married soon.

  12. i know that a person going through such situations can only understand this.but always keep this in mind that baba says"why fear when i am here"?

  13. I feel the same sister lonely and rejected by baba. I really dont understand if he is really alive as per his promise does he even see the pain. Terrible is the word that i can feel right now for wat has been happening in my life and instead of improving things have only gotten worse specially on personal front since i took his sharan so i am at a loss to understand this and have started doubting whether he is really there? if yes then y is he making me go through hell and still not help me and if this is wat we get by being in company of god then is it not better to be without god or even depending on god for nething. I have done umpteen number of parayans and sai guruvar vrat also but so far nothing has improved in my life as such except for some small events which are not the burning issue or priority today even I am very upset with baba and ur post just reiterates my feeling. I would say dont ask for any advice from anyone just sit back and relax thats wat am doing.

  14. Baba is not a wish fulfilling tree. You are his devotee is what should make you confident of getting the best in your life. Baba will give you only what he thinks is best for you and not what you think is best for you. My advice is, clean up your Karmas… do some social service and see a counsellor. Start afresh. Shraddha Saburi!

    • Om Sai Ram. I agree with you.

      I would like to share a story with you. May everyone understand that our Sai is not wish fulfilling tree.

      बाबा पर हर परिस्थिति में विश्वास रखो…….

      कभी कभी हम जो चाहते हैं हमें वो नहीं मिलता ……तो इसका अर्थ ये नहीं हुआ की बाबा हमें प्यार नहीं करते …..या उन्हें हमारी चिंता नहीं है,
      एक घटना……आप सब को बताना चाहेंगे….
      एक बार की बात हैं, एक कल्पतरु का वृक्ष था, जिसके नीचे बैठने से मन की सभी इच्छाओं की पूर्ति होती थी, तो एक दिन एक आदमी धुप में थका हारा था, पेड़ क नीचे बैठ के सोचने लगा, के काश
      पानी मिल जाये, तो मेरी प्यास मिट जाएगी,
      तब पानी आ गया, फिर उसने कहा के काश यहाँ पर खाना भी मिल जाये तो पेट भी भर जायेगा, तो वह खाना भी आ गया और उसने खा लिया, इसी तरह उसने सोचा के, कहीं अगर यहाँ भूत आ जाये और मुझे आ के खा जाये तो,
      ठीक वैसा ही हुआ, भूत आया और उसे आ के खा भी गया,
      क्यूंकि वो एक कल्पतरु का वृक्ष था,, मन की सभी इचाएं पूर्ण करता था,,
      वो ये नहीं देखता था की किसी के हित में है या नहीं,, बस जो माँगा वो मिल जाता था,,,
      पर हमारे साईं बाबा एक ऐसे कल्पतरु हैं….जो सिर्फ वही देते हैं, जो हमारे हित में होता हैं, तो बाबा को मालूम हैं की हमें क्या मिलना चाहिए और क्या नहीं, हमें सब उन पर छोड़ कर निश्चिंत हो जाना चाहिए, वो हैं ना हमारे बारे में सोचने के लिए,,
      बस यही बात याद रखो हमेशा,,,,,,के मेरी चिंता बाबा को करनी हैं..बाकी सब तुम्हारी चिन्ताओ का भार बाबा अपने कंधे पर ले लेते !!!!

  15. Om Sai Ram,

    Sister please do Sai satcharitra parayan and 9 weeks thursday vrat.Baba will definitely listen to you and will give you peace of mind.Pray to Baba to call you to Shirdi soon.It is the testing time of your life.Baba never let his devotees down.Please have Sand Saburi.If you pass this testing phase you will realise baba has blessed you with a wonderful life.My sufferings in life is much more than you.Comparing to mine,yours suffering is nothing sister. I am the most unhappy child of Baba.I am 35 not yet married and even jobless since 9 years but i never feel low after starting to read sai charitra.Baba has given me peace of mind even in this bad patch of my life.I Have 100% faith in Baba that Baba will bless me too with a wonderful life.I too used to think of committing suicide but not anymore.When Baba is there why should we need to fear or worry.In this bad phase of my life Baba has worked on me internally.He has made be a good person from within.I know Baba is there for all his devotees.So sister when so many days have passed why not wait with patience some more days.Keep reading sai satcharitra.Baba will shower all his blessings on you and am very sure about that.If possible please visit http://www.shibpursaibaba.org and offer puja to baba.Your wish will be fulflled.Shibpur sai baba temple has some devine power like shirdi.No body has come empty handed so far after offering puja there.May sai bless us all.Om Sai Ram

  16. Om Sai Ram.

    Dear Sai Sister.. have faith in Baba and as others have suggested please read Sai Satcharitra and do the 9 Thursday Vart. It is all very effective. I was going through a very bad phase in my personal life, and Baba inspired me to do good karmas..so i started donating food almost everyday. Biscuits, cakes, fruits, chocolates .etc. I donated to small children, poor people, old persons and animals too (dogs, cows etc) .I tried to bring a smile on someones face daily, tried to do some good deeds often. It worked and in some months all was well and i got married. So please do start your life afresh and let Baba plan your life, as he knows our future the best and he can change our fate for the best. He is nice and sweet and very kind. We have to pray him to bless us to do good deeds to deserve his Grace. Please start from your home by keeping your parents, family members, friends and relatives happy. Baba will bless you soon.

    Baba, please take us all in the right path always. Help us ever. Be with us always and bless us. May your blessings reach all of us. Love you and many many thanks for everything.

    Om Sai Shri Sai Jai Jai Sai.

  17. Sai sisterji, like others said please do sai satcharita parayan, also Please think twice before taking any decision in life. Im sure Baba will help you overcome all ur past karmas, and will bless you with a happy peaceful life..

  18. Dear Anon devotee,
    I don't know whether you will read this or hetalji will convey our messages to you personally, but please don't think about killing yourself. I know how it is feeling lonely, whatever person talks nicely and shows you some attention, you keep all your hopes on them, even though you shouldn't do that. If you are really feeling lonely, why can't you go to an orphanage and volunteer some time there, those kids need your love much more than the manipulative guys who cheated you. Baba will be much more pleased with you and start showing his grace.

  19. JAI SAIRAM,
    Baba is great.
    ANANTHA KOTI BRAHMANDA NAYAKA RAJADHI RAJA YOGI RAJA PARA BRAHMA SHRI SACHIDANANDA SAMARTHA SADGURU SAINATH MAHARAJ KI JAI.
    SARVAM SHRI SAINATHARPANAMASTHU.
    Please excuse us for our mistakes Baba, Please Baba, Please Baba.
    I Love You Baba.

  20. Om Sai. There are other people suffering in the world, but sometimes our problems become too hard to handle. I know how difficult life can be with continuous hurdles and problems. It's easy to lose faith once we get tired/exhausted by life. Having said this, we only have this chance to break free from this cycle. Don't take life to seriously as all it is, is a game to reach the end point. Your focus should only be on Baba nothing else, everything else is just a test to distract you and every time you get dejected or lose focus, you are running out of time to reach the end point. Keep focusing on Baba, ignore everything else- its only an illusion. Do right, doing wrong will only bring you more problems. Om Sai

  21. Jai Sai Ram,

    Sister. Sorry but I am being direct to you. God will never play with people. He is Generous, kind and always have mercy on his devotees. From what I have read above, you have made many wrong choices. Specially falling in Love with a married guy!! did you not think about the consequences?? about the mother and the child? please do not blame god for your mistakes. If you really want to come back and lead a normal life, then stop being selfish, be kind, be good and mostly respect your mother.

    Start to medidate on Baba, read "Sai Satcharitra" with complete devotion and love. Baba will certainly fulfill your wishes.

    Allah Mallik,
    Servant of Baba.

    • Exactly. I know how it feels when a girl is behind a married person who has kids. Ofcourse its husband mistake too. It will like hell for that wife. You are thinkinv about your love but not about that wifes love. Plaese dont go after married persons.

    • I simply cannot understand what goes on in the minds of these girls when they "fall in love" with married men
      Don't they think about his wife?? Love!! My foot.

  22. sai child please dont feel rejected our saima is always watching us and taking care of us yes we have to suffer in life because of our bad karma so dont feel dejected just you chant sai sai in your heart with love you will deffinately feel blissful experiences and do read sai charitra and keep nine thursday vrath with faith and always imagine that saima is always with you in your goo time and even bad time love him like your father then in only few days you will deffinately feel the changes in your life dont complaint that god is not taking care of you just hold on to his feet with firm faith and patience whenever you feel rejected or feel like crying just chant his name with love he will come to help you trust him thats it…OM SAIRAM..

  23. Start reading Sai Satcharitra sister…dont ask for xyz in life, i know its our desire ….if you really want to ask something then the ask should be SAI…..when i first started reading SAI SAtcharitra on APRIL 15th 2012..i just requested to SAI that "whatever happens call me to shirdi on OCT 15th 2012 on the MAHASAMADHI DAY"…belive me i was there in shirdi on that day ….and im so happy now…..and this happiness came to me after 10 years of hardship in life …now im really at peace….like small kid i was running around the temple…i will pray for you…om sai samarth..

  24. om sai ram
    Everybody has given you very good advice. Please read Sai Kasta Nivarana Mantra (Kashto Ki Kaali Chhaaya Dukh Daayi Hai,
    Jeevan Mein Ghor Udhaasi Laayi Hai……..) atleast 3 times (morning,afternoon and evening).Definitely you will start seeing the difference.Even i am going through a bad phase in life & i also feel like leaving this world.But when i see my parents and siblings face i feel i have no right to bring sadness into their life because of my act.So be strong and love your parents. Even though your father doesnot talk to you gift him something very often and bring a smile on his face.Keep your mother happy .See very soon Sai will come and solve all your problems and very soon you will be married.In vedic astrology it is said Father represents Sun planet and Mother the moon planet.And when both the planets are worshiped well in the form of giving love to parents all your tensions will disappear.Just try this for a month and see all positive things happen in your life.Feed all the animals like cows,dogs and crow etc., feed poor people feed children and you will be relieved from your past life sins.
    And please please don't go after married men.Remember you will be responsible for breaking somebody's innocent home and it will add more to your account of sins.Stop searching for love outside,enter your home and seek love.
    Surely Sai will bless you dear.

  25. Dear sister,

    I was in a similar position and used to blame Sai Baba for everything – loss of my love, death of my father, delayed marriage, unsatisfaction in job etc and the list was endless. My depression caused grief to my family. One day in agony, I asked Sai Baba to help me and show me some direction- that same day Sai Baba in his own way introduced me to BK Shivani(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T5p9fU-KzdA). I listened to her lectures and felt as if Sai Baba was talking to me. I felt a positive surge of energy and an year later now I can say that my approach and attitude has changed in life. Now I am happily working in one of the biggest MNCs in the world at a very well respected position, am married to one of the kindest and godly soul and am leading a happy and satisfied life.
    I would urge you sister to try changing your outlook and there are so many tools for you to do that- you can read "Sai Satcharitra", watch BK Shivani lectures etc.

    May Sai Baba help and bless you!!

    • Good Advise. Follow this…. slowly and steadily your life will change. Do not just waste your time living in the past. Just take action to change your life today….Watch the episodes of the Shivani…Initially for the situation you are in, they may not appeal to you…. But you must use all your will power to take action to change your life today….. if you are waiting for someone to come and rescue you from this rut you will be sadly mistaken…God helps those who helps themselves…. You take one step he is ready to take 10 steps towards you…. think of relationships only when you are firmly grounded on your feet. Look at men, they like women who are independent and self made… you get there first.

      Who does not make mistakes… everyone does. But..it is wise to learn from mistakes. Failure is only when you accept it, otherwise it is just called an attempt. Never give up….keep attempting you will never fail. Never belittle yourself by talking about your character…they are just mistakes.. Clearly define for yourself what you want in life and see them joyfully come true for anything that is wished from the depth of your hear will come true.

      Oh you lioness, raise and roar the loudest roar and set forth on the path that will amaze everyone, including those who scorned you just a few months or years back.

      This is when Baba comes into picture sending all the help you need to get there…

  26. Dear Sister,please do not get hurt and ask why baba is not helping you.Even I'm the person I feel Baba is not helping me for a moment when things do not favour me.Immediately I console myself Baba knows what is best for me.Important thing is we should pay for our bad karma.The sufferings we have now are a result of our bad karma.We are just humans.We cant read others mind though we love him deeply.
    This is my personal experience.Even I suffered a lot in my life almost all 15 years with love breakups and divorce.I know that phase was so painful.Just like you if unbearable I pray baba to punish me in a hell instead of letting me suffer in a human form.Baba answers me and give me a peace of mind and courage to lead my life.surely we feel that why baba didnt stop a guy whom we loved and got ditched enter into our life.Baba can do that..why not? But we should pay for our sins.Still I remember one stroy from Sai sacharithra How Baba helps to get out of our past sins.Please read the Sacharithra.You will surely be blessed by baba and he would guide you in each and every step of your life.Instead of focusing on guys whom you suffered with , Just chant sai's name.Believe that HE is the supreme Power can change your life.As suggested by our fellow devotees , spend time with children in orphanages and try to participate in charitable activities.Just leave what happened to you in the past , start afresh.Please pray baba to be with you and guide you in your life.I'm sure HE will never leave your hand.I know it's very hard.But concentrate on your life .Be positive.Baba blessed me with a loving and caring husband after 15 years of painful suffering in my life.Still I'm struggling with my health problems and other issues in my life.Someitmes I feel probabaly my past bad karma is still there to be paid off.But I strongly believe Baba is there for me.Never ever think that why baba is not fulfilling my wish.Baba knows what is best for us.so whatever is happening leave it to Baba.Have a firm faith and pray HIM to be with you and lead you as per HIS will in your life.sure you will see miracles in your life..Shradda and Saburi…
    OM SAI RAM.

  27. Death will be avoided.Remember Sri Sai baba.I have got this answer from saibaba question and answers website for you.
    Jai Sai Ram…..

  28. Sister… what is happening currently is all due to our past karmas.. We are the creator of our destiny…. Dont worry have faith in baba… with his grace you can get rid of your past karmas.. U have to have strong faith in him.. Donate whatever you can even a small 2 rs bisucit packet will also do… and see the changes that occur in your life…

  29. My dear Sai sister,
    Please go through d next sentence…
    "I CRIED, BECAUSE I HAD NO SHOES, THEN I MET A MAN WHO HAD NO FEET".

    If u r not in job currently,this is d best time in ur life to pray BABA. Devote the maximum time u can,to read SAI SATCHARITRA. Try to complete d book as soon as possible and then repeat it again and again, assuming that this is your job for next one month. My sister, we all belong to the family of SAI and do not think that u have been ignored. Pls do not cry, just wait for d Miracle to happen.-Sairam.

  30. DEAR SAI SISTER,
    I M ALSO FACING THIS TYPE OF PROBLEM FROM LAST 3 YEARS.
    I LOVE MY BOSS VERY MUCH & HE ALSO LOVES ME & HE HAD WORD WITH HIS FAMILY ABOUT OUR MARRIAGE THEY ALSO LIKE ME BUT THEY DIDNT GET AGREE FOR OUR MARRIAGE DUE TO OTHER CAST.
    EVEN I HAVE STARTED 9 THURSDAY VRAT,& READING SAI SATCHARITRA ON DAILY BASIS.NOW I HAVE PEACE OF MIND.
    KEEP SHRADHA & SHABURI THEN U WILL GET EVERY THING WHICH U WANT

    MY BABA BLESS U

  31. You have held on for so long, hang in there for a little bit more. All will be fine. He has something magnificent lined up in life ahead for you. Have faith and every time a negative thought comes, replace it with Sai Sai.

    Dear Hetalji, a kind request, please do not think otherwise. Going by the flow of stories that are coming here I see that they are almost 2-3 months old. Especially when people who share such distress it is necessary that you act immediately to give them relief.

    I know you are inundated with experiences from devotees but if you can use help to reach out to more people and ease their troubles, do drop a line in this thread and I will share my email id.

    Jai Sairam

    • I agree, such stories should be shared immediately, its more important to show people hope than just reading miracles.

    • Wouldn't it be just wonderful if this went on to become not just a platform to share experiences but also a full fledged support group.

      Hetalji, please let us know in this thread so we can help.

      Jai Sairam

  32. DEAR Sister.
    first of all bring a smile on your face, life is too short to keep crying and blaming. Going thru your mail i didnot see your problem as too big to make you think of killing your life, Dear soul God is there or not is a belief, no body has seen, whatever has to happen it will that is the only truth, we are born , we will die. Every body has problems , hurdled, setback in life , and we cant do anything except praying and moving on.
    Dear only if you can see God is in your Parents, make your relations better with you Dad, if he doesn't talk, doesn't mean he doesn't care for you. get close to him , may be has his own worries, get out of your problems and share his.
    i have father like this, he doesnot express, but loves me deeply. if relation are not at home they can never flourish with strangers. Blood is thicker than water, introspect yourself and see where problems lies. and above all let your parents choose your life partner, he will be best.

  33. Everyone gave u nice suggestions.Try to see where u went wrong,bcz its imporatant u to realise..if ur inner soul says what mistake u made, then its the best thing! apologise baba and promise him that u will be a responsible person.We have to behave ourselselves first..then only we have right to expect God's blessings.
    Relax, keep ur mind cool.come out of your own world..make good frnds..
    We all pray for u..And surely you will find a nice partner in your life.You will be happy,best wishes to u.

  34. You can't blame sai for your problems …seems like you have made wrong choices also you need to understand that when you go out with married man , you will hurt everyone around you ….sorry to say this but you r the cause of ur own problems … you can change your destiny only by changing yourself

  35. start Sai Satcharit = read a chapter or two everyday and also do Vishnu Sahasranama everyday if you can and you will see how your life changes. We all go through phases in life where we make mistakes or have regrets because we are human. We have to be patient and have faith in Baba's mercy. He is making you go through the hardship before he rewards you. Start praying to Baba with full faith and see what He does for you. He is an ocean of kindness. Om Sai Ram.

  36. Hello Friend i dont want give any advice and make you feel more restless and painful.Many of our friends have given their valuable comments and advices from their point of view.Iam saying from my point of view.While reading your story i felt that you have even more problems which you have not penned down.All is fair in love and war.So you need not get carried away by thinking that you were wrong or you are a sinner.At times humans brain stop working especially when in trouble and in love.You have fallen in love during your painful times so went out of control.Just forget your past.Can understand that you are going through a bad phase of failures in career,love life,family life etc.Only the person who is suffering the pain will know its depth.For you, your problems are big for me its sort of ok for someone else it may be nothing.It varies.Its very similar to the head ache we get it differs from person to person.Some cannot withstand the pain,some take pills,some go to doctor,some forget they have a head ache after few minutes.Since you have mentioned that you are a staunch devotee you just keep praying to our Sainath.Above all love yourself first,keep reading positive quotes and move around with positive people.Sorry to say this but that married guy is unfit for you.He was not true to you nor his wife.He said goodbye to you just because he got caught.If he had loved his wife he would have not come to you,if he did not like his wife for some reason but loved you then he would have come away from his wife legaly and fallen for you.He failed to do both.So if it is because of this person you are crying then you are wasting your precious time.Please try to come out from this first then you will automatically get attached with Sai soon.You have also said that you are crying on all thursdays.This makes one thing very clear that our sai is very close to you that is the reason he is keeping you by his side on thursdays.I will pray for you to get the job you desire and wish you good luck to get a wonderful and loving husband.Just keep saying Sai,Sai…things will get better soon.All those who are against my comments kindly excuse me if iam wrong.
    Sadguru sainathaye namaha.

    • Wonderful comment.I really liked the way you adviced and suggessted.You are very much right..the wearer only knows best where the shoe pinches …similarly the one who faces the problem only can feel it ….no one else can understand the depth of her/his pain.Your comments at least have personally helped me a lot in consoling me.I am also going through very bad phase of life but no one understand the depth of my pain.I truely agree with you Giving lectures is easy but understanding ones sorrow is not possible by anyone.

  37. God Bless u..I understand it is hard for you but try to be positive..Baba sure will help you..if you think negative n negative then negative will hit you…so have faith in Baba n try hard to think and be positive..Om sai

  38. Please follow the advise given by Anon about BK Shivani vedios. Good Advise. Follow this…. slowly and steadily your life will change. Do not just waste your time living in the past. Just take action to change your life today….Watch the episodes of the Shivani…Initially for the situation you are in, they may not appeal to you…. But you must use all your will power to take action to change your life today….. if you are waiting for someone to come and rescue you from this rut you will be sadly mistaken…God helps those who helps themselves…. You take one step, He is ready to take 10 steps towards you…. think of relationships only when you are firmly grounded on your feet. Look at men, they like women who are independent and self made… you get there first.

    Who does not make mistakes… everyone does. But..it is wise to learn from mistakes. Failure is only when you accept it, otherwise it is just called an attempt. Never give up….keep attempting you will never fail. Never belittle yourself by talking about your character…they are just mistakes..

    Clearly define for yourself what you want in life and see them joyfully come true, for anything that is wished from the depth of your heart will come true. But you must add faith to it. Meaning, do not doubt your dreams.

    Oh you lioness, raise and roar the loudest roar and set forth on the path that will amaze everyone, including those who scorned you just a few months or years back.

    This is when Baba comes into picture sending all the help you need to get there…But you must take the first step… that is the law. He is waiting for you, come on, cheer up and start your journey..

  39. Please do not take this as criticism but I will state some facts about what you said. This is only to help analyse yourself and move in the right direction:

    1. You seem to want someone to hang on to. You seem to want someone to lead you, guide you, help you… or what ever. Many girls are like this. Analyse why? By any chance do you think, this is what is love. No. You can love someone and still be independent. I think men love independent girls. In your current situation, any one can come to you say few good words and you will start depending on them or falling in love with them. Is this good? Do not be so vulnerable. You even thought it was okay to have a relationship with a married man. Your vulnerability overpowered you conscions.

    Think hard and do not make anymore mistakes on this front. And do not blame God for your decisions. All humans have free will to choose what they want.

    2. You seem to think low of yourself, why? Have you made mistakes that no one has ever made. Mistakes are just that. If you can accept the mistakes you made and take responsibility for it and determine not repeat them, you are as good as new. It is human to err… Is someone around you is taunting you and making you feel low? Fight it or get rid of them from your life. Analyze yourself where this low self esteem is coming from. Take professional help if you need to analyze, but remove it from the roots.

    Repeat this "no one, no one but I can help myself". God can help but only if you can take charge.

    3. You seem have negative attitude. "As you think so you are.." If you are thinking that you can not get a job, you can not. If you think you can, you will. If you think you can get good review and promotion you can. Change your thinking. Read the book ' "Power of positive thinking". Or this free online book:
    http://www.leaguelineup.com/tempsite/files/James_Allen.pdf.

    You believed in failure, you got it. You believed in failed love, you got it. Changing the mind set takes time and effort. Put that effort and you will make it.

  40. You should do 9 Thursdays vrat and also read the story of Mr. Ambadekar in Sai Satcharitra about how he wanted to kill himself in Shirdi due to problems in his life, but Baba didn't let him and told him to finish off the bad karma and soon it will be over. Soon your bad karma will too be finished off and then you will start feeling happy. Baba is there with all of us as we suffer through bad things in our life and He eases our sufferings as much as possible. Baba never abandons us and Baba is there with you each step of the journey through life. Don't worry, things will get better and Baba is there standing right next to you. Om Sai Ram!

  41. Sorry to hear your story

    Dont lose ur hope….try to forget all those things. Those guys are not fit for you, that's baba didn't gave to you. Think of baba all time like think his name or sing any small baba mantra always and u can see baba everywhere. Why you think u dont have friend baba there, just speak to baba as a friend. First of all dont sit/feel alone, in home itself do pooja, help ur mom, do some work/clean the house it will divert your mind. In morning & evening light a lamp in front of god, read or tell some slogan. Like this first deviate ur mind & then automatically u can able to forgot everything.

    Baba please bless your daughter and give a good life.

    Om Sai Ram

  42. I read the post and I am also one of those devotees feeling left out by baba. I am now 46 years old unmarried woman suffering from depression andall lalone in my life/ lal my years of hard work has gone in the dust bin since i was trapped and cheted by one person. I was suffering from depressio nadn unusual headache problem for 18 years now no doctors could cure it, my runing to shirdi many times begging abba has all not been answered to the extentth at now I beg baba to give nme death. I do not want to commit suicide atthe same time I do not wat to live thislfe that has been destroyed by others and by my mistakes. Callig them all as bad karmas do not give solution nor do they give us ou =r happiness. I do not want just menatla peace i wasn tlife. I thinkl i also deserved to have a normal life and I do not know why God has brought me to this condition. It is true that we make wrong decisions and go behind wrong things, but situations are pushing us lie that and I have felt the strong pulling force bringing me to disaster like this. I wish baba had protected me like a real mother not allowing me to be trapped by others! No mother will watch her children to go i nthe wrong path and then just say it was your karma! Baba was likea friend to me I had suhch faith in Him for 154 yeras but now I lost eevrything in life have only bad memories and pain and I am roamingaround lie a heavy loser. People are sympathesisn me and my old parents are worried sick about me. I am suffering from severe depression for 19 years and only it is spoiling my whole halth now. I wanted to write in detail but i do nt =ot know how to submit the post in this site. Everyone says baba knows what is best for us and what to give us, I only know what baba has given me and Ido not consider my stuation os the best that baba could give. I am not arrogant, I am very uposet and angry with everything in life now including abba. I cannot believe when I ahd fallen at His feet begging for help, He will crush y entire life even taking away whatever little I had? I desperately feellike going to the pastfrom where h=things were becoming disastr and have a nowmal life if not a very great one. I know it is not possible so I am forced to beg baba atleast to give me death saving me from sryin g every day in life like this!

    • Dear Sai sister,

      I dont have words to console and also think that mere consoling it not going to help you or bring you out from pain.Tears shead wheni read your post.Can understand that a person has ditched you but why is that you were not married?R u working anywhere or not?If you have stress you will suffer from headaches no doubt in that.Please do some relaxation.

      Will pray on my part as well for you.

  43. I wrote the post a few days ago. this is continuation. I am working even now. I got into depression and tension head ache problem when i was 26 years old when I got some shocks in my life. I was also not happy with the type of work i was doing though i got into good company. I underwent lot of treatment but nothing couldccu re me. y head ache would start the moment i got upo from bed and be there till i go to sleep. I lived with it and did a lot of hard wok in the office got a very good name due to my hard work,. I went to office all week ends also worked 12 hours a day. Still i was not happy with my work. My ambitions grew strongr and started going into depression for this also. That is when one senior who was 20 years older than me came to me did alot of counselling sweettalk promises that he will tke care of me asked me to join his department then slowly started behaving emotioal also with me. By this time I ws 36 years old and suffering from heavy depression already. I felt as though Ia was all the time within some walls where Iothers could not reach me and i could not go out. So this person's counselling lot ofaffection and care he showed made me emotinonally dependednt on him though i loooked at him as philosopher guide initially. He brin washed meeveryday that he was fond of me etc. etc. and slowly i got used to it accepted that kind of talk. I was not sure whetehr i should change to his department but i as scared to refuse also and so left it to god. To my shock i was allowed that change which was very unexpected. In the new place there were people who refused to let me do anything, he started cheating me, my depresesion also increased and i started fighting with him. he humiliated me publically made me all alone in life, my previous position all lost my ambitions no where fulfilled I am so cornered and sideline din office and he stopped my personall ife growth also. Now he is retired runs awawy at the sight of me complains to others about me and i am all alone with severe illness new health problems started. I cannot believe when i was at baba's feet to protect me cure me and give me life one person will be sen tto me and all happiness could bbe wiped off. No amount of crying to baba has helped me and today i am all bruised. My depression did not allow me to accept any new person my parents got to meet me all thes eyears. I used to feel likerunning away whenever a new person came to meet me for marriage. I was so fond of my career and that is why i fell into his trap now that is washed out. He is happily enjoyigng his life baba is showering every happiness possoble to him even after retirement but istand losing everything. I am so angry i did not eve napproach this person he came to me chsed me and then killed melike this!

  44. Baba has shown me today also that He is so much against me. I was hust very badly today and I was let down in m ycareer my boss turned so deadly against me and I was harassed. I am being troubled so much in office and today again baba went against me. I am now convinced that baba will continue to hurt me till I commit suicide.

  45. Hi Hetal,

    I am also facing the same problems like you…but after going through all the comments I felt relaxed. I am also a true believer of SAINATH…I wish he will show the right path to his devotees and bless them with love and happiness

  46. Baba plzz help me baba…u knw everthing about me…plz help me…i want u in my dreams baba plzzz come baba…plzzz

    OM SAI SRI SAI JAI JAI SAI

  47. I had also experienced a love break….if u had read shri saisatcharitra holy book….it is written that..baba is seeing everything u get…in the book it is written if u feel the worst period in ur life..be blessed that said baba is watching u…the worst u feel is what u done in past..the past life ,the past karma….. Baba knows everything of his devotee….it is the universal law..wat u do in past..the same u get in future

    Baba is removing your every past bad karma by making u feel….have faith in him…according to him ,HAPPINESS can only come by removing every SORROW of life……I think u r getting wat I m saying…

    The worst time of yours will come to an end….and when u feel success u will came to feel ur best time…

    Have faith , god bless u
    Om sai ram

  48. Hi everyone. .
    Om sai ram ..
    I am in a very painful state… I dont hve own house.. my hysband business is shaking..we dont have healthy bank account.. I was into job but I was not ableto get ppregnancy since 5 yrs..hence I left my job so that I can get my treatment done coz my job was gery demanding and my boss was very bad he used to mentally torture me….v are statying in rented house…I have nothing .not a job.. baby..house. ..only tensions… few people like my fatheinlaw told me he will support us snd promised to help us woth some money….but he refused noww…

    Baba u know that I am doing saivrat and pray to u everytime and came to shirdi also…but still y my prayers are not reaching you…baba..im feeling most useless person with black or no future. …

    Pls do something or else I will die…….

  49. Hope is something which makes us lead our life i believe that baba is responsible for developing that hope in me <3 <3

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