1:33 AM
Sai Ki Deewani
Anonymous Devotee says: Namastay Hetal Ji, this is my humble request to please don’t disclose my name or email. I am the same person, who posted Baba's Stavana Manjari in Telugu pdf very long back. Hope you remember me. Now, I am in a very miserable situation with lot of guiltiness. I am unable to control. Here is one experience of mine with Baba. Please post this if you really feel its worth to post in your blog.
"Dhuk Mein Sumiran Sab Kare Jo Sukh Mein Karena Koi,This is Kabirdas Doha, which I learnt in my school days, which applies to one and all and particularly to me. I used to pray to Baba like anything to fulfill my wishes (Job and my other personal problem). I daily used to go to temple and pray to Him. I used to tell so many things to Him about my problems.
Jo Sukh Me Sumiran Kare Dhuk Kaahein Ko Hai."
Then suddenly, one night I cried a lot before Baba idol and asked Him to help me. I asked him like anything. Then suddenly my eyes fell on one book brought by my roommate “Saibaba's question and answers book”. I took it and prayed to Baba and opened one page randomly with saying my problem and asking a solution. With closed eyes, I pointed my finger on one answer from that book, in which I got a reply like “Reading Guru Charitha on Ugadhi (South Indian's New Year) will solve my problems”. With a little hope, I slept that night and waited for Ugadhi festival day.
That day, I went to Baba temple and started Guru Charitha. From morning to evening, I sat on the floor before Baba and started reading it. Till evening 11, I think I continuously read that book. I read about all Avataras of Datta Prabhu except Baba's. Then I became helpless and weak and unable to continue reading any more. Tears dropped from my eyes and I started crying before Baba that I am helpless and can’t read anymore please forgive me. Then I ate little Prasad and slept thinking all my effort was waste and Baba will not forgive me.
Even next day morning also, I didn’t start reading it. But in the evening around 7PM, I opened and started reading. After I completed some stories about Baba, then suddenly I got a call from my school friend saying there are some job openings in one company and her friend wanted to talk with me regarding that so she gave my number to her friend.
Immediately, I prayed to Baba seeing this miracle. Then that girl called me and told me all the details regarding that job and asked me to prepare well and there will be an interview for me in 2 or 3 days. I felt so happy and at the same time little nervous because I fear attending interviews. I told the same thing to that girl also. Then she told that she will arrange a mock interview for me and asked me to prepare well. Then I felt little relaxed and started preparing for that praying to Baba that it’s all in His hands. With lots of disappointments and surprises I got this job. Because there are 3 rounds in the interview and I did too worst on last round of interview. So I completely lost the hope that I will get this job. I cried before Baba saying that why Baba why You are doing like this to me. Then I regained myself and continued my routine life of job hunt and doing courses. I had no hope of getting the job. Then suddenly around or after 1week, I got a call saying that I have been selected. But still I didn’t believe that call because I know that I did not do well in the any round and in last round. I really made it worse. But once I got a confirmation mail about my job, then I started believing it. To my surprise, I got this job with a very good package, which I didn’t even expect in my dreams. One more thing is that there is a 50% subsidy on lunch and snacks and dinner are completely free in that company. Why I am saying this in particular is to say how Sai Maa (mother) takes care about my health. Because I don’t really eat properly. Then I felt the love shown by Baba on me. Now what all I am enjoying and eating, this is all Baba's Bhiksha to me.
Every single penny is His Bhiksha. Every single piece of food I eat is His Bhiksha. One should never forget His mother, who showers this much love and who ever forgets they are simply equal to animals. I am bowing my head before Baba's feet and accepting that I am such a worst animal forgetting His help.
Once I got a job, I stopped praying to Baba. Not intentionally, but daily I used to come back from office very late. But I agree this is not the proper reason to say because at least in my heart I should do prayers, which I didn’t do. I stopped going to temple completely. Slowly I lost interest in prayers and worshiping Baba. But sometimes, I used to think about Baba. Other than this I did nothing. Then slowly things started changing in my life. One after the other problem surrounded me. My personal life is completely ruined. I am still continuing the same job but with no concentration and satisfaction I am doing that job. Daily one or the other problem is surrounding me. Now everything is again blank in my life and now tonight I felt so ashamed of myself and started crying before Baba asking Him to please give me one chance. I was begging Him like anything. This is all my mistakes, completely my mistake. Even I told Baba that once I get a job, I will write His Leela of helping me in getting a job. Now 8 months completed and I realized and writing this. I am feeling so ashamed of myself. Now I realized how a child can live without His mother. Really I can’t live without You, Baba. I am such a big fool, who forgot You after I got a job. This is the reason why I wrote that Doha in the beginning. Now nothing is left in my life. Don’t know whether Baba will show any mercy on me or not. Whatever He may do, I won’t leave Him. Whatever might be the situation, I will not leave Him. If Baba is there, I am there and if He is not there, I am not. I understood this very clearly.
I am no one to give any suggestions to anybody, but my life is a very big example of "What's the situation of a person? Who leaves the company of Baba and forget His help". I am sorry as I can’t reveal what exactly has happened in my life now. Now nothing is left for me. I lost everything. But I hope you all can understand the pain that I am feeling now and you won’t do the same mistake. I want to hold Baba's feet very tightly and start crying for what I did. Baba, please forgive me. Please and please forgive me.
© Devotees Experiences with Shirdi Sai Baba
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27 comments:
Dear Devotee, It is very difficult to break the Maya. I too do the same mistake again and again. It's not that I forget Him, but many a times I pray Him mechanically. That is good sign that my Bhakti is deteriorating.
Baba is very kind, He excuses and takes to His lap, once His children understand their mistakes.
May Baba bless you with happiness.
Om Sai Rama
Please don't despair .... I am sure if feels like uhave lost everything BUT believe there is light after extreme darkness ....Baba loves all his children ..... JAI SAIRAM
Please don't despair .... I am sure if feels like uhave lost everything BUT believe there is light after extreme darkness ....Baba loves all his children ..... JAI SAIRAM
Dear Anonymous Devotee,
Dont worry, Baba is testing you..He is always with u....dnt wait for anothr second...start worshipping Him agin with full devotion and love...
BABA BLESS YOU
Om sai Ram....please dont lose hope...Baba is with you....everything will be fine....keep faith and patience....Baba will never leave us....
Om sai ram.
baba please help my family from this difficult state pls baba
Please dont be so harsh on urself. I too sometimes do mechanical puja or overcome with extreme despair think of leaving him but kind Baba that he is he always brings me around. Sometimes he does that by making me read experiences such as urs or sometimes gives me some postive signs etc. I am surrounded by doubts every time since my problem not getting solved for more than 3 years now still I am struggling along only due to his grace. You also please hang on. Things will get fine soon.
Don't ever blame your self for anything. BABA is there with you always. Never despair in life. BABA is there with you every moment. In Sai Satcharitra, BABA also stated that why fear when HE is near. He will give you everything on the right time. Have Faith and Patience.
OM SAI RAM
JAI SAIRAM,
Never feel that you lost everything, because what you lost may not belong to you. That's why Baba did that.
Baba will do everything for our good sake and you'll realise this later. In Sacharitra Baba said " Whatever is yours will be with you and whatever is others will be with them. God gives everything for our good sake."
So just feel that Baba did everything. The fact is Baba is the one who did everything and doing everything.
Don't worry, Behappy. You realised your mistake and started worshipping him again. That is more than enough, Baba will definitely help and will be with you always.
Surreneder completely to him and leave everything to him.
ANANTHA KOTI BRAHMANDA NAYAKA RAJADHI RAJA YOGI RAJA PARA BRAHMA SHRI SACHIDANANDA SAMARTHA SADGURU SAINATH MAHARAJ KI JAI.
SARVAM SHRI SAINATHARPANAMASTHU.
I LOVE YOU BABA.
PLEASE EXCUSE ME BABA FOR MY MISATKES.
I believe thats only we that brake the thread of Bhakti from our side, baba is same Karunamayi as he is always just we all need to do is to reconnect with baba.
Sai Baba is always with us.No need to fear.Remember sai baba said "WHY FEAR WHEN I AM HERE" . Let us be ready to face any challenges ,with the faith that Sai Sadguru will lead us .
OM SAI RAM.
Please dont ever think that Baba is punishing you. But do pray so that you can get the strength and the hope to face any difficult situation. May babaji be with you and help you!!
Jai Sai Ram
Dear Devotee, I was like you too . I did not know much about Our benevolent Sai until recently, But I used to pray to other gods. When things were going fine in my life I somehow left praying to god... and then troubles started in my life. It has been so bad that I can't talk about it to anyone. That is when I discovered my Sai , my father , my mother. I came to know about him through a family friend and then I researched more and more about him. This blog has been most helpful in showing me his leela's. I started reading the Sai Satcharita. Before this I was very troubled and my mind was at unrest. But now my Sai has shown me so many small miracles that he is there with me. I know that I have been suffering because of my past actions, and the mistakes I did, but my Sai has blessed me else I would never have been able to pray to him. He has got me back into his care and he will protect me and my family from all troubles.
With Sai's grace , the troubles in my life will be over. I pray to our Sai Maa to take you in his care . Pray to him and surrender your life at his feet. He will surely take you out of your troubles.
Thank you Sai Baba for your blessings on me and my family. I am sorry for my mistakes, please forgive me !
May your hand bless all your children. Please be with us always and guide us, that we may never waver from the path shown by you.
Shree Sachidanand Sadguru Sainath Maharaj ki Jai.
Dear devotee,
God doesnt punish you.you maybe facing a problem at this time and world seems to come to an end..but understand, you are not being punished, maybe something has been taken away to empty your hands, so that you have the space to accept to something better. I think I can guess what your problem is ...all will be alright..have unflinching faith at his feet..and believe he is taking care of everything for u..
thanks
Dear Devotee, You should be happy that u have realised love of sai maa an his importance in your life, Sai Maa is our mother Kno he forgives us oly once if we ask him sorry whole hearteldy, now start a new life forget all that u did in past because mistakes haapen with all of us as we are oly human beings, Babaji never went away from you he is always with u, jus surrender ur life whole heartedly to him and let Sai take it any where jus go with him with full faith and patience ok na, evry thin will get solved don worry......
"Jis haal mein rakhe Sai rehte jao,toofano se kya darna toofano mein behte jao "
Om Sai Ram,
Baba Maalik
Dear Devotee,
Dont Worry! As Baba Says do not try to swim simply float in world/ Sea. Completely surender to His lotus feet, rest will be O.K. "Put Kaput Ho Sakta Hai, Mata Kumata Ho Nhi Sakti." Baba can't leave His devotees.
Om Sai Ram
Dear Devotee
This is all Maya and we humans are too small and weak to stay away from it. Also my mother ones told me if we want to know how God feels when we do something , we must imagine our parents in his place as parents have same heart as that almighty . Just like parents get sad if children forget them but never punish them for this, so is God. Therefore don't worry and keep your faith and patience in our dear Sai Baba. He will bail you out of all troubles.
Om Sai Ram.
Don't worry about your current troubles; all things will pass and everything will work out. I have learned that at the time it may feel like it is very difficult and how will I get through this situation, but eventually everything works out the way it will according to Baba's will. Baba will forgive all your mistakes. I too am a busy professional, but just try to spend a few moments thinking of Baba daily, and have told Baba that if I can't do a regular pooja daily, I will at least do this for you.
Sukh me sumiran jo kare to dukh kahe ka ho...... just sometimes no matter how hard we try thing just keep going wrong ..... we get whatever destiny has decided for us .....
jai sai ram..
i think this story is a lesson for me ..
dunno bt somehow baba is making me feel thru this experience that i should be paying more attention towards prayers and visiting sai temple..
Hey mate
by reading you experience the only thing come to my mind is the story from sai satcharitra of the villager who's crop was burnt & he cried.
Baba replied him saying “what is lost was not ours”
i m sure you must have read the story
My friend it is we who are ignorant not baba. He never think of punishing his kids even if we do the biggest sin
so don't think that he is not looking at you just cause u stopped praying him
He also said that if kids do urinate on one's lap what can we do, we can't cut our leg
So even if we do mistake he readily forgive us
Trust me once he accept us he will never leave us. Sometime it take some time but it is his mantra that we got to remmber shraddha & saburi
Don’t give up
Om sai
Sai Ram. Most of the times we experience mental pain because we are hanging on to something - a realtionship, money, postion or a material thing. All these are designed to cause us pain. There is noone who is completely happy with those things. They are always wanting more...but never happy. Like a river learn to move on, do not hangon to the river banks. Like a dry leaf blow with the winds of life. Baba will reach you to you destination.
God may have his own plans for us (which are far superior than ours). But we want it our way, because we can not turst Him with his plans. We want it now !! We can not wait. Many times he listens to us, but sometimes he decides to administer medicine.
Dear friend, all I can say is that looking back in a year or two, you will say what happened to you was good. And that Baba's plans were better. I have seen that so many times, I am sure many devotees here have seen that.
He took away a good job to give a better one, in the interim, I was blaming him. We can not see the ful plan so we get agitated. But when you surrender you are HAPPY (mark this word) knowing the master of the world is incharge of you. He will pull you out of the direst situations. Nothing is impossible for him.
Om Sai Ram,
Om Sai Ram,
Om Sai Ram,
Om Sai Ram,
Om Sai Ram
hello sai brother how can you able to know my life story.Actually u r written my story exactly.JAI SAI NATH.
Om Sai ram..
I think this a lesson to me.
I stopped visiting sai temple completly . I will start again .
Please dont worry , he will help you .
it is his way of getting you more closer to him.he is dying to get your love again.
hi dear i read ur exp we shud alwyz keep in our mind that never do the conditional pooja.if u really trust and have a full faith on baba then gve all ur life to baba he wil take care of all the things .there is one book called sai kriti read it for 40 days then definetly a gud change wil come to ur life .
take care if u want this book then post a comment on this site only jai sai ram
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