Sai Sister Supriya from India says: Jai Sai Ram Hetal ji, My name is Supriya. I have already posted a few of Baba's Leelas (read from here), which have happened in my life on your blog. Thanks again for this wonderful platform. It surely gives a lot of strength and support in times of need. Thank you so much. Please do not publish my email address. Sorry for making it too long!
I have witnessed many Leelas of Baba in past 3 years that I have really worshiped Him, loved Him with all my heart. Prior to that, I did pray to Him, but it was only for the sake of praying. I respected Him, but I always thought how a human can be God, but He really is God for me now. Please forgive me for thinking so Baba. I do not know any other God and have left my life in Your hands.
This is something that happened with me in Dec 2010. I bought the first Moorti of Baba and brought it in our house in June 2008. I kept it on the table right in front of me, so that He can see me and I can see Him all the time. I started praying to that small statue. Then one day, I decided to give up rice and started offering Khichdi as Naivedya to Baba. Thus, slowly slowly my faith grew and I started doing things for Him. I used to take Him to the nearest Temple for holy bath at times, make clothes for Him, talk to Him and speak my heart out to Him. In Dec 2009, I started knitting a small handkerchief size piece for Him, so that I can make Him wear that as it was really getting cold with each passing day. I started knitting in the first week of December and it would have only taken a day or 2 for me to complete it. But for some reason or the other, I could not. It was 25th Dec 2009, Christmas Day and I did not feel like going out anywhere. I was at home and so thought of completing that small shawl for Baba. I was making it in Reddish Maroon color. I finished it by evening and somehow felt that it was incomplete. I should either make a small lace border around it or do some embroidery. I finally decided to make a small crotchet lace and started looking for some wool in the house. I had quite a few, but none of them looked as good as white. So I made the lace with white without thinking anything. When it was complete, I made Baba wear it. It really looked nice and He was glowing and then I realized that it was Christmas Day and Baba was looking as if Santa Claus has come to bless us on Christmas and fulfill our desires. I had never planned it this way and it really brought tears in my eyes. I thanked Him with all my heart. Meanwhile, I had also brought another small statue of Baba from Shirdi and both of them were placed next to each other and I used to worship both of these.
In first week of December 2010, i.e. the very next year, a very strange thing happened. I did not pray for a few days. I do not remember the exact reason, but I suppose the only reason could have been was I was going through my monthly cycle and so did not offer any Naivedya to Baba. I guess my sister did. Anyways, I still remember, it was a Wednesday and I offered rice/Khichdi to Baba and I just felt that the old Moorti looked very pale. It looked as if someone had sucked the whole life out of it, like if you suck out the blood from somebody. I just looked at Him and asked Baba, why do you look so? Are you fine? Then I thought maybe it had fallen and so I checked with my father, sister and our maid that if the Moorti had fallen by mistake and everybody said no. Of course no one would lie in such a case. Nevertheless, I went to work. Similarly on Thursday and Friday, it looked even more worse. I could really see Baba's face shrink and the Moorti was becoming even more pale (sort of blue) and I was really not able to make out why. Anyways, I prayed as usual and went to work. I guess may be in my hurry to leave for my work, I just could not see His pain. Please forgive me Baba. On Saturday, while I was offering Naivedya, it still looked lifeless, in pain and blue like a person without blood. I was really worried because I somehow always felt He was looking at me through that Moorti and it never looked so. I thought, maybe it is winters and He is feeling cold. I asked Him, Baba are You feeling cold? Why do You look so? I thought I will make Him wear a Shawl or something. It was only a small hand size Moorti and so I picked it up and it felt much lighter than it always did. I removed the clothing on it and the foot of the Moorti was completely broken, as if it had been chopped off. I was so scared and worried seeing that. I started crying thinking that He was trying to show His pain and I did not see it. Some mis-happening, that was probably, coming to one of us. Did He take upon himself? I ran to my father who was luckily at home, as I just did not know what to do. He saw that I was disturbed and in tears and reassured that Baba took our troubles upon Himself. We then took the Moorti to Yamuna ji and immersed it there. I just did not feel like letting go off it.
I can never forget that look, that feeling of pain I saw in His face and I was just cursing myself as to why did I not see it. I do seek forgiveness for this ignorance Baba. I know one Panditji in Shirdi and I had befriended the lady of their house. Luckily after many months, that very night I got a call from her. I spoke to the Panditji and told him about this and he reassured that it was Ok and generally these Moortis are not made from marble, but from plaster of Paris and wax and may be because of winter it had started contracting and thus the Moorti broke. But the fashion in which it broke, Nevertheless I got one more Moorti of Baba. I could have both the Moorti's like before.
I am a very dumb devotee You have Baba, who keeps questioning You, keeps faltering between faith and mistrust. But all I know is that You are life for me. I always try to make You happy. I am always thinking of things that I can do for You, so that You smile, when You see me and hold me and make this path of life easier.
I am sure He is looking at me every moment and He does have plans for me. But I do get scared of the test sometimes. I just pray Baba that You help me, hold on and fulfill Your words soon. I will share many more experiences soon, as and when He asks me too. Thanks and Jai Sai Ram!!
© Devotees Experiences with Shirdi Sai Baba